From Reader's Digest (Jan, 2011)
" I was in a restaurant yesterday when I realised I desperately need to break wind. The sound system was really, really loud, so I timed it to coincide with the beat of the music. I finished my coffee and noticed that everybody was staring at me. Then I remembered. I was listening to my iPod." (Don't quit get it? Google 'break-wind' that you'll understand the joke)
Really funny Out-Of-Office Auto Reply:
- I'm not really out of the office. I'm just ignoring you.
- Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.
- The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending again.
- Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.